Super Douche

Super jackass on facebook

Super whore on youtube

For those of you who can’t see the video consider yourself lucky.  Basically this guy is on a Japanese dating show.  He comes out in a incredibly idiotic costume and exclaims that he is “super Gaijin”.  Gaijin is short or slang for foreigner.  It can also be seen as derogatory.  So basically this would be the equivalent of someone calling himself “Super Nigger” or “Super Spic”.  This guy embodies everything that is detestable about foreigners in Japan.  He speaks the most horrible of Japanese.  His accent could not be any more atrocious.  And you wonder why Japanese people are always so surprised when they hear a foreigner speak even slightly decent Japanese or read the most simple of kanji.   So this giant turd of the human is basically asked a series of questions on what he likes/why did he come to Japan.  The translator explains that he came to Japan to look for Japanese girls.  No shocker there.  He then is asked why he likes Japanese girls.  With nearly unintelligible Japanese and mostly English, he states that he likes Japanese girls because they are smart.  He also thinks that American girls are SOMETIMES “big”.

Really consider this scum bag.  This guy is despicable.  This sack of shit makes me embarrassed to be a foreigner, an American, and a Temple graduate (yes he’s from Temple).  Anyone who didn’t understand why I am so fully disgusted by the creeping refuse of Roppongi and to a slightly lesser extent, foreign Temple students, I give you exhibit fucking A.  This form of idiocy should not be tolerated by anyone.  He likes Japanese girls because they are smart?  Please.  If that were the case then why was his following statement reffering to American girls sometimes (stressing SOMETIMES.  Don’t want to be too douchy right?) being fat?  This guy should not be praised.  He should be shunned.  I hope that any girl this waste of space lands is just as vile as he is.  One can only hope.

Greed and Idiocy Are Universal to Humans (even Japanese ones)

One common thing that I have noticed with many Japanophils (including myself) when first coming to Japan is our incredible ignorance about Japanese people.  Us lovers of Japan have been brain washed by over romanticized writings that we have read over and over.  From JET blogs to actual non-fiction novels, many of the authors are under a spell when they write about their Japan experience.  They see everything through ruby lenses.  This is then passed to us ignorant travelers.  We come to Japan believing that the people of this country are unlike us evil westerns because not only are they polite, they are also gracious hosts who would are lacking whatever it is that makes us evil foreigners greedy and ignorant.  I would like to dispell this idea once again.  I will refrain from talking about honne and tatemae because I would more like to focus on one issue and also just one experience I had.

I want your lovers of Japan to open your eyes (if you are already enlightened then congratulations).  Drum roll please…. JAPANESE PEOPLE ARE HUMANS LIKE THE REST OF US!  GASP!  Muttering among the crowd.  Yes its true, Japanese people are in fact human.  This being the case, they have all the positives and negatives all us other humans possess. Some of you non-Japan lovers will wonder how is this at all surprising.  Well let me shed some light and repeat myself.  People that love Japan spend most of their time reading all the lovely, glimmering and awe inspiring half truths about Japan.  I say half truths because Japan does rise to many expectations sometimes.  Violent crime for one, is much lower in Japan than in most places.  I am not refuting that.  What I am concerned about is people have this idea that all Japanese people are polite, timid and shy people.  Utter bullshit.  I will admit, I meet many shy, polite, and timid people in Japan.  There are a lot of them.  But there are just as many, loud, obnoxious and entirely rude people here.  Walk down a street in Shinjuku and night and you can see shining examples of this.  Japanese people can in many ways actually be MORE ignorant than American’s (whom the world loves to hate and make generalizations about in the opposite fashion of Japanese).

In case some of you didn’t know, here is a little history lesson.  During the Edo period which lasted from about 1600 to the mid 1800′s, Japan was a closed country.  They even have a word for it (shikoku).   Then one day America (don’t you just hate that place?)  came over with their black battle ships and basically told Japan, “Yo open your country or we will blast your asses”.  Japan “grudgingly” accpted this.  Grudgingly is in quotations because they hated or ways but they LOOOVVED our technology.  They realized that they were basically in the stone age and if they wanted to be a world power they needed to get with the times.  So they opened their doors to the world (there were some that traded with them a bit before the opening of their country) and soaked up the best tech and systems they can find.  To this day, that is why Japan has things like beer and school girls.  The idea was that they would use western technology but keep their Japanese spirit.  That was the slogan that was brainwashed into them at the time (now being the meiji then showa periods).  After world war 2 when they lost the war, Japan changed their tune again.  Mostly because they had to (again thanks to America).  They became an economic power and gave up war (article 9 in their constitution.  Look it up for some nice controversy).  I’d also like to say that although they no longer go to war, they have the second most advanced army in the world (its called the self defense force).

So that’s a lot of history.  It’s pretty clear that the people of Japan must know a lot more about the world now that they are an open country right?  Guess what.  No, a lot of them actually know nearly nothing.  The amount of times I have had students not able to find places like America or England on the map is quite troubling.  That’s just the tip of the iceburg though.  People genuinely think the most ridiculous things in Japan.  Here is a great example of this.  This comes from a story I heard from a friend.  For a period of time a little while in the past there was a surge of robberies performed by some Chinese immigrants.  These were mostly caused by a group and they were eventually arrested.  There was a media storm about this though.  People basically believed in Japan that Chinese people were different than Japanese people and that they are all burglers.  Here’s where it gets really insane though.  They started marketing, and this is true, they started marketing “anti-Chinese locks”.  ANTI-CHINESE LOCKS!  Locks that could not be cracked by Chinese people.  How insane is that?  This kind of shit is rampent in Japan.  If you live here, how many times have you experienced having someone be dumbstruck by the fact that you can read the simplest of characters?  I have regularly met people, children and adults, who believe that it is IMPOSSIBLE for a foreigner to learn how to read and speak Japanese.  When it does happen its like a fluke.  This can work in your favor when you want people to buy you beer and such but it’s still annoying.  I have been restricted from entering bars because I am not Japanese.  Certain apartments will not allow non-Japanese to live there.  If this shit happened in any other country, you can bet your ass that someone would be getting sued.  And with good reason.  What it comes down to is Japan is 99 % Japanese.  Think about that for a second.  Ninety-nine fucking percent.  For anyone that lives in America (other than the middle of no where) this is a ludacris number.  This is the only factor that allows me to accept some of the obscene ignorance that you see in this country.  If you (or any human) as so cut off from the rest of the world, it is more than likely that you too would also be just as ignorant and naive.  Problem is is that this isnt 1600 anymore.  This is the 21st century and the world is at everyone’s doorstep what with media like the internet, tv and movies.  People should know more than they do.  One of Japan’s other less than stellar traits is its inability to change.  Like even the littlest bit.  And this doesn’t just include topics on foreigners.  They even do it to themselves.  I won’t go into it but there are so many things that Japanese people do that serve no purpose.  They can be extremely wasteful things to just downright confusing things.  I realize that all countries do things like this but Japan does it in spades.  You just have to experience it.

Ok, thats the end of that rant.  I would like to present one more thing though.  This is an experience I had that had absolutely nothing to do with race relations or race for that matter.  This was something that I experienced in Japan but it could have happened literally anywhere.  Today, I went to the laundromat because I needed to wash my comforters.  They are big and my washing machine only holds 4.5 kilos.  I used the biggest free washer that I could find and sat down and started studying some kanji.  With one minute left on my timer, a man comes in.  He is bearing a small box.  Possibly the size of 4 rolls of paper towels.  He proceeds to open the last three remaining dryers.  I look at him and I say to myself,”No way, this is not going to happen.  He’s just checking them”.  Nope.  Sure enough he carefully separates his clothes and splits them into three parts putting them carefully into each of the dryers.  When he is finished, each dryer is maybe 1/5 of the way full.  Maybe less.  To give you a mental picture, one of these dryers could hold maybe 25 towels when properly filled.  Maybe it could hold 30 if you go slightly over the line.  This man put in all of FIVE towels into this fucking machine.  I was fuming with anger but I thought, “Ok maybe he will set each of the dryers to only 10 minutes because those things are going to dry super fast”.  Nope.  THIRTY FUCKING MINUTES EACH.  To paint yet another mental picture for you, I have taken my comforters to that particular laundromat before and it only took twenty minutes to dry one of my comforters which are each a little less than a load in each dryer.  This man used triple the time he needed on each dryer.  I just stared at him.  A cold hatred in my gaze.  He looked over at me and I just shook my head.  He looked away.  He looks again and I am still looking at him as pissed as can be.  I walk over to my GIGANTIC by comparison washing machine and throw my comforters into a cart with a crash.  I wheel it over to my table, all the while looking at this pile of living shit.  He looks at me and looks away uncomfortably.  I am not going to wait 30 minutes for a dryer.  It is supposed to rain today and I was already taking a chance being there in the first place.  As I get read to leave i look at him again and mutter loud enough for him to hear, “you cocksucking mother fucker”.  Hes Japanese so of course he doesn’t know what I am saying but I continue to mutter to myself.  As I am readying to leave, three separate people come in.  Two old ladies, and a pregnant woman.  Two of them had dryers already but one didn’t.  Now an old lady must wait because this dipshit had to have all the dryers to himself.  I leave but give him one last stare of contempt as I go.  I swear he may of had a smirk on his goddamn ugly, fat paunch face.  I leave without causing a scene because I am a pussy.   As I walk home I am not only mad at that cockgobbler but at myself as well for being so passive-aggressive.  The line was almost broken though.  I have never come so close to jumping over to raving lunatic and just flipping out on someone.   I wish I had.  At this rate is could happen sooner than later.  My point is, this could have happened to anyone, anywhere because humans are greedy and they are retarded.  So if you plan to come to Japan do yourself a favor, remember that humans are humans and be ready to not only have a great time but also be ready to experience the same bullshit that you experienced at home.

Babyfest 2009

Posted this on another journal of mine but I figured it was Japan related a bit so…

In past posts I remember talking about how I wanted a job that would change the world. I posted about how I wanted a job that made a difference. I said that since I can’t be a real superhero, I wanted to help the world in another way. My my my how time changes us. Maybe it didn’t change me but allowed me to see the real me. The real me is quite lazy. I don’t have the courage or the passion to go through with all that schooling and study the amount that I need to to get a job like that. I finished school but my degree is utterly useless (asian studies HUH?). So what’s my outlook look like? Not good. It’s not that I can’t find a job to do. It’s just that there is no job that I will love at all. My job in the future will only be for the purpose of providing me money. What kind of existence is that? Whatever job I will be doing will be for the next 25 years of my life, doubling my life. How do people work at a job they don’t love? The only way people can do it, at least as far as I can tell, is by lying to themselves. So many people do it. They rationalize their job by saying it supports their family or something gay like that. That doesn’t change the fact that the job sucks shit and its robbing you of your life. They also tell themselves shit like, “my job is important and they need me”. In most cases this is also bullshit. Unless you are doing a job that requires a lot of intelligence or training, the more menial the job the more replaceable you are. Most jobs have no importance at all. Someone needs to do it and anyone can. Thats the job I will most likely get stuck with. I’m thinking some sort of job that teaches me a skill that could at least be useful to my life like an electrician. I won’t love the job and I will loath getting up in the morning for half of my life but I will loath it less than other loathable jobs. That’s really all I got to look forward to. A job that I loath less than another job. There is no job that exists that I will love. Not to my knowledge anyways.

My girlfriend tried to see if she could think of a job for me even though I told her it was impossible. She asked me, “what would be an ideal job for you?”. I told her it would have to be something easy. It would only require to me work maybe 4 days a week and only 6 hours a day. It would also pay me a decent wage. Something like 80,000 a year or something. I told her that there is no way any place like this exists because if it did everyone would do it. There are no shortcuts in life. I know this. Minus winning the lottery, I will probably be mildly depressed for the next 25 years of my life.

I know I can have one or the other. I can have a really easy job that doesn’t pay well or have a job that requires me to work a bit but pays a decent amount. I have to compromise. The thing is I need it all to be happy. I know thats retarded. Maybe I can overcome that someday and kid myself like most people but right now that isn’t happening.

Before I talk about what my current job is like I’d like to mention a thing about money. I hate money as much as the next guy but I still want enough of it. Growing up my parents always told me about how,”we can’t afford this,” or “we dont have a lot of money right now”. I hated it. I hated it so much. To this day they tell me these things and I really hate hearing it. I never want to be like that. I mean within reason obviously. I don’t want to be rich. I just want to be comfortable. I never want to have any serious worries about money. I want that money but I really don’t want to work for it. I know that sounds lazy but I can’t help but feel that way.

Now I will talk about my current situation. I hate my job. It sucks waking up to go to that job every day and deal with the same old shit. How do people do this to themselves? It hardly pays. I was comfortable before. Kinda wanted to be more comfortable but for the time being it was fine. Now with my student loans I am no longer comfortable. I don’t have to worry about living really but I wanted to go to a Japanese language school and its going to be a real bitch to save up money for it now. I pretty much have to live like a pauper just to have enough money saved up to live off it. I’ll still need to take out a loan to pay for the school. Pretty much nullifying all the money I paid to that point.

Teaching at an english teaching school (eikaiwa) is bullshit. Not only are you 100 percent replaceable but id say 80 to 90 percent of the kids do not want to learn English. They don’t care at all so it makes it impossible for me to care. Not only that but I am a mediocre teacher. I don’t know what the fuck I am doing. I just slap some bs game together and call it a lesson. Anyone could do my job.

The only glimmer of hope in my job is my private students. They actually want to learn English and try. They make me feel like I am helping. Only problem is that they are on a fucking Saturday. So I could either give up the prime weekend day and have some classes that matter or I can give up those private lessons and have only shitty classes. I opted to keep the private lessons because I don’t know if I could last if I had to deal with those little bastards for 8 more months without having some ones that wanted to learn mixed in on a rare occasion.

Bottom line: Eikaiwas are pretty much expensive day cares or just wastes of money all together. Most of the kids at this school that is supposed to be focused on LEARNING HOW TO SPEAK ENGLISH, can’t speak to save their lives. Sure they pass their English proficiency tests and everyone pats them on the back, but who really cares? Its all going to be forgotten.

This brings me to Japanese. The bane of my existence. I am currently studying to pass the level two Japanese proficiency test. I will not pass it but that doesn’t matter. It doesn’t test you on speaking. I could get a perfect score on that test and not be able to speak Japanese. Since I have come to Japan my Japanese has nary improved. This is mostly my fault for not practicing by making friends and speaking Japanese regularly. Still, you think I would be a bit better. I think I am defective. I am going to try one more time. I want to go to this Japanese language school if I can. Its about a 50/50 chance right now since I don’t know if I can get a loan for it. The only reason I am going is so that if I fail I can say I tried. I usually give up before I try everything because giving up is easy. I’m trying not to give up on something just once in my life. Japanese brings me little pleasure anymore. Its mostly because I constantly feel like a failure as is. I know I haven’t failed yet but I might as well have failed already. Its just that I can’t visualize myself speaking Japanese at all. Its not just that though. Every day, I hear Japanese being spoken and although I understand more than I did before, I am still always lost. Also I am constantly reminded of how little I know every time I go out. Whether its reading ads, newspapers or just ordering food. I can’t do it at a respectable level. This Japanese school is my last chance. Even that I don’t look forward to. Japanese schools are filled with Koreans. Korean and Japanese are basically the same language. So you go into these schools and everyone there speaks decent and then there is me. Speaking like a dipshit. I won’t be going into a beginner class but an intermediate one since my knowledge (at least for tests) is too high for basic. So I will constantly be the underdog. I’ve been in this position before with Japanese and its so unbearably humbling. Every day you just feel like a dumb ass. At least at that time I was with people that sucked at taking tests and I pretty much rocked them every time. That wont be the case with these Japanese schools. These people will study and they will do well. So basically I am going to have to work my ass off to be mediocre. You know how I feel about work. I am only doing it so that I can say that I did it once and didnt get scared and quit.

I have a friend that has a friend (whom I met) who is basically a genius. He is really smart and his Japanese is quite good. He has studied very hard to get to his level. He now is studying German and within 6 months feels that his German is better than his Japanese. He feels that since Japanese is so much different than western languages, that it makes it nearly significantly harder for a westerner to learn it. Awesome. A rather intelligent person is saying this. I am no where near as intelligent. Basically I am fighting a losing battle. Mediocrity is all I can hope for. I want the best or nothing. Maybe I should give up.

People always tell me, “you should talk to your girlfriend in Japanese”. No. I won’t for three reasons. One, I only see her once a week. I am not going to waste that time feeling like I have to do work. Two, I hate feeling like an idiot around her. I can be an idiot around anyone else but I don’t want to act like a moron around her. I know she wont think less of me but I will still feel shitty. Three, she laughs at me when I speak Japanese. She laughs at my pronunciation and my mistakes. One time I wanted to buy something and I wanted to check my Japanese with her. I said, “do I say 買ってください” which basically means “Can you buy that for me”. She laughed and she said sorry it was just a funny sentence. She said she was laughing at how the sentence was ridiculous not at me. Still felt like it was at me. I didn’t feel as bad that she was laughing at me (although i did feel pretty bad about it) but more at that I made such a basic mistake. I thought about it some more and knew what to say but I guess it might not be that natural I dont know. How can someone that makes such mistakes ever become good at speaking? I’m fucked.

日本に住んでいる間の嫌い物だ。

Alrighty, The title of this post is “Things I hate while staying in Japan”.  At least I think thats how you say it….  I’m having trouble writing a lot off the top of my head but I’m going to try

1.  Appliances suck: In this country, they seem to sacrifice things working well for power efficiency.  For instance, I can’t pop popcorn in their microwaves.  You put the popcorn in and it takes like 3 minutes just to pop.  When it does start popping, it never really picks up speed and if you want all the kernals to pop, you need to leave the bag in for so long that it burns.  Also the rice cookers take like 40 minutes to cook the damn rice.  They are painfully slow.  I think its because they have a soak time programed into them but still, they suck.  The driers here are TERRIBLE.  Ok the industrial ones aren’t but the ones they have in the dorm blow.  You need to leave the clothes in them for like 2 hours.   The industrial ones work a ton better but you need to pay more for the amount of time you leave them in there so it comes out about even.  BS I SAY!

2.  People are allowed to be racist:  I can’t rent any apartment I want because people can just deny you because you are a foreigner.  They would be sued in 2 seconds if this was America.

3.  People walk to slow:  You would think in such a bussling city, people would walk fast.  Nope.  They walk as slow as ants unless they are trying to steal a seat on the train where as then they run like Olympic sprinters.   Not only do they walk slow, but they don’t walk to a particular side of the sidewalk or street.  In America, its kind of known that you walk to the right.  Since people drive on the opposite side of the street here you would think that they would walk on the opposite side of the sidewalk.  Nope, they just walk in chaos.  At least normally they do.  Sometimes in train stations they fabricate decent walking sides since the gates kind of corral people.

4. They have 5 dollar coins:  On a day when I don’t spend money I wont have much in my pockets change wise.  Any time you spend a decent amount of money though, you wil have like 20 dollars in coins and that weighs like 5 pounds.  Its really annoying and also can cause you to lose a decent sum of money by just sitting on a couch.  Which reminds me, Im going to check the couch cushions tonight in the lounge for some free scratch.

5.  Rice is more expensive here:  You would think the food that sustained most of the population for thousands of years would cost LESS than in America.  It costs about double.  A 20 pound bag of rice here costs 30 bucks.  Thats crazy.  I assume they do it to support their farmers.  I had heard something about Japan being very proud of producing their own rice so I assume they raise the price to keep what farmers they have.

6.   The trains stop at 12:  You have to get used to partying all night and spending much more money than you ever would on one night here than you would in America.  Either that or start your partying earlier.  The trains stop at 12 so if you havent gone home at the right time, consider yourself stranded in the area you are in unless you want to pay an arm and a leg for a taxi.  What makes it worse is the fact that you usually need to transfer at least once on your trip home.  That means that if you are partying in lets say Shibuya, and you want to get home to Saitama, you need to leave at 11 just to get home to catch the last transfer train home.  It big sucks.  This is why I had to walk home with a friend for 10 miles on a school night.  It was a miscalculation by one of our Japanese friends.  Which brings me to my next hated thing.

7.   Japanese people know nothing about their surroundings:  So you would think that if you are looking for something to do for the weekend that it would be good to ask a Japanese person that has lived in the area their whole life huh?  Well, chances are, they have as much knowledge about the area as you do.  Japanese people don’t know how the trains work either.  I’ll let it slide a bit because the train system is huge and as is Tokyo but come ON.  You might say that I am making a broad generalization but I have talked to multiple Japanese people and I am usually greeted with the same ignorance about Tokyo .

8.  Everything is too expensive:  Everything is too expensive

Anywho, I complain a lot about this crap but I still love Japan.  I wrote this more just for your amusement.  Usually, I am not bothered by this stuff so much.  Except for the too expensive thing.  That bothers me all the time.

Blind dates with older girls = I have no money for real now

Alright well let me explain.  I don’t think about abbie on a regular basis or at all for the most part.  It was just that particular situation that owned me so Im not really letting her hold me back in any way other than by not allowing me to be with dirty club girls.  If anything I could see that as a positive.

Last night I went out with Derrick and his seemly new girlfriend and a few of her friends.  They are all office ladies and have money.  This should have been a red flag for me about having dinner with them.  We went to a sushi place and the bill for each person was over 4000 yen which is like 34 bucks each.  Yea I have 0 dollars total now so I cant do anything anymore.  The night would have been better except it felt as if I was put in a blind date situation.  The one girl that was the cutest spoke very little english and was really really boring.  If that wasn’t enough, shes one of those clubing types and made out with this douche bag named andrew that LAUGHS AFTER EVERY SENTENCE HE SAYS.  No exaggeration.  I want to kill him every time he opens his mouth.  You know spicolli from fast times at ridgemont high?  He sounds just like that but hes not from california.  She said it was cute.  Im not gonna associate with any chick that find that guy attractive.  Thats like putting me at his level which is a huge insult.  The other girl was really cool and nice.  She also had a nice body but her face and teeth…  Couldn’t over look that.  I talked to her the most because at least she spoke a decent amount of english and liked a lot of good music.  There always seems to be one blaring problem with the girls I meet in japan.  I really tried to over look the cute girls boringness and tried to make her come out of her shell but she just acted like a big baby the whole night.  She wouldn’t sing karaoke.  Aren’t you japanese?  She wouldn’t let me carry her on my shoulder with her friend till she was pretty much forced to do it.  She also wouldn’t just wear my damn glasses when I asked her to try them on.  I wouldn’t have felt as much pressure to talk to these girls if it wasn’t for Derrick telling me that his girlfriend said that they were interested.  I couldn’t see the interest at all.  The one “cute” one kept doing crap like not sitting next to me at karaoke or on the train.  Before I am accused of coming on too strong, I can say with all seriousness that I wasn’t.  She was just a tard.  The other one was totally into anything I asked her to do and she sang at karaoke.  She knew most of the songs I sang and sang with me and she was totally down for riding on my shoulder.  We also all ended up staying at one of those all night manga places for peolpe that miss the last train home and she read some manga that I had told her I liked.  Yea she was definitely the coolest.  She was also the closest to my age.  She is around 10 months older than me where the stick in the mud cute girl was 25 or 26.  As usual though, she was only friend material.  Well, I will at least have a lot of friends when I leave japan.  Im sure that over time I will find someone so I don’t particularly feel that bad about it.  This night though was like a giant blind date outing for me so it was way too much pressure and I couldn’t just relax and have a good time.

飲み放題に行こう！

Man last night was pretty sweet. It went better than I had expected. We decided last weekend that we were all going to go to shinjuku and go to a nomihoudai for the night. I was a little skeptical that it would be fun because, well I dont know why I am just a negative nancy. Before we went out, our school had a pizza party in the lounge. I only got one slice of pizza and I was really pissed. Also all these people were there and it was pissing me off. I think it was a mix of not eating all day and the horrible way that they ran the food. For one thing, they had hotdogs but they didn’t cook them before hand. They only had one of those hot dog rolling machine deals where it turns the hot dogs on rollers. They could only cook 8 at a time. 8 AT A TIME FOR LIKE 200 PEOPLE! I was so pissed. What moron does that? Also they got the pizza 30 minutes late and they didn’t get it all at once. It came in shifts. They didn’t have any line for any of hte food. It was just a mass of people that ran up to the tables taking multiple slices. I really wanted more than one slice but I wasn’t gonna be a jerk and take like 4 slices when there wasn’t enough pizza for everyone. So yea, I was in a bad mood and I had this feeling that it would carry on through the night.

This one guy and I walked back and talked about chicks. It was aight. We got back and I just ate a loaf of this pumpkin bread stuff. It sorta sucked. This one guy had bought what he said was gin and tonic. It turned out he got gin and just carbonated water. It was disgusting. 18 year olds dont know anything. I was like, “if it was tonic water, it would have said tonic water”. So I choked down one glass of that and it just made me tired. So the night is still going crappily. Me and about 3 other guys head out for shinjuku after this. It was a decently long train ride and it was packed. Shinjuku is an awesome part of Tokyo. There is tons of lights and hot chicks. There was this big building that had a bunch of the windows light up to look like old school donkey kong. We had to wait around for a while because this one group of people decided to walk to shinjuku from school. Thats like over a 3 hour walk. They were big tards. We also waited for this other guy to get back from some date in a different part of Tokyo. I don’t mind waiting. These two guy hassled me into speaking japanese and I just stumbled over Japanese in my usual manner. I used to think that it was pointless to say short sentences because I already know that kind of basic Japanese. I was wrong though because I know it but I cant say it fluidly. I trip up and leave out little basic things or I speak like a robot.

Anywho, we waited for the people to come to us and while we waited we just drank huge beers right in front of the station. Hundreds of people just walking by and we are sitting on the ground drinking big beers. I love Japan. When everyone was together we started to hunt for the nomihoudai. Shinjuku is huge and layered. There are stores 6 floors up in most of the buildings so finding stuff is really hard. This one gusepach guy I hang out with named mike was starting to get pissy as usual. Hes such a gusepach but hes cool. He just gets super pissed about the littlest things. Especially if he thinks he has gotten disrespected. One good example of this was when this one girl didn’t talk about him and I not being in this picture on facebook. It said something like, “heres everyone except for kelsy”. He shows me the picture and is like, “DOESN’T THIS PISS YOU OFF?”. I was like, umm no?

Back to the story, we turn this corner and there is a chick in a maid outfit, a chick dressed like a bunny maid, and maybe another maid only shes wearing a super skanky maid outfit. It was so hot. We asked if we could take pictures of them but they said no. They totally had this sleezy body guard guy watching over them. He wasn’t even big but he looked like hed shank you in a second. He just stood there with his arms folded, super greasy hair and looking pissed. It was awesome. We cross the street and mike starts to talk to this one guy on the street. Since the stores are so layered in this place, they put out “recruiters” to get people to come to their place. This guy told us about a nomihoudai we could go to for only 25 bucks. We could stay all night if we want. I know I’ve explained nomihoudais before but Ill explain it again. Its roughly translated to “drinking buffet”. You pay one fee and drink as much as you want. We stayed there for like 2 and a half hours and I was plastered. I don’t quite remember everything half way through and after it. We were super loud and obnoxious. I totally taught everyone to do the heater high five and we did a huge round of it with 9 people. They dont totally know how to do it right so I guess we did a modified version where instead of spazzing when we get to the end we all do a huge group high five. I dont remember why we did it but it was sweet whatever it was. I arm wrestled people and got dominated by this guy named aaron. Hes super jacked up. I told him that Im gonna try and beat him by the end of the summer. He doesn’t work out hes just huge. Ill probably get destroyed. I lost to the mike guy with my right arm because i was drunk and I had just blown out my arm trying to arm wrestle aaron. I beat him with my left hand though because it wasn’t wasted. Have you guys ever tried flexing when you are drunk and feel like your muscles are mush? I like cant control my muscles when Im drunk. Its like Im at half strength its weird.

ANYWHO, yea it was tons of fun. We left there and waited for Aaron’s girlfriend’s brother to meet up with us. He was pretty cool and his girlfriend was cool too. They barely spoke english at all so I was talking to them in Japanese. It was honestly, from what I can remember, the first time I wasn’t nervous when talking in Japanese. Unfortunately, by this point I was so hammered that I could barely remember any Japanese so I just sounded like a tard and I also kept saying all my sentences like they were questions. DONT CARE IT WAS SWEET. It sorta partially cured me of my fear maybe. Im going to start talking in Japanese a lot more hopefully. At this point of the night I pretty much have to be lead by someone pulling my hand because I have no idea how we got to the place we went to. I know I took an elevator to get there. It was a really tiny bar. Our group of friends pretty much filled the whole place if thats any sign of how small this place was. There were totally these drunk guys just passed out at one table sleeping. I think I had more beer at this place but Im not sure. I had no money by this point but people were definitely buying me things. I think I ate some food. Yea I did, it was like pickled stuff and then i had these chicken dealies. Oh and either before or after we went to this bar, we went to mcdonalds and I ate this burger called the tsukimi burger. Its pretty much a giant breakfast sandwich with this weird pepper sauce. It was delicious.

It was a full night of partying but it was time to go home. By the time we get out of the bar, the sun is already starting to show. We walk to the station and still have to wait 30 minutes for the first train to come. Everyone is absolutely dead but I am strangely awake. We get back, go to a convenience store, buy some ice cream, and get to the dorm. All the guys take a shower and we talk about stupid stuff that I dont remember. I just remember it being stupid. Maybe it was about cartoons? I went back to my room and talked to burger and nate. Nate and I talked in all caps and it ruled. I think I went to bed around 630 or 7 in the morning. When I woke up later I wasn’t hung over at all and it was awesome. I realize that now I need a job just to handle going out. Ill take out loans for my daily living expenses. Also if my dad gets me that credit card for food I will be sooooo set. He needs to get on that. All of this happened on just one night out. We might go out tonight to that slutty roppongi place. I dont know if thats actually going to happen though. Although it is really trashy, it seems like a place I need to go to at least once in my stay in Japan. That place has to have some stories.

EDIT: Apparently I also hit on some japanese chick on the train ride back. I totally forgot about it but all I can remember was asking her how to say veins in japanese. We were doing some game where we saw who could hold on the bar in a chin up the longest. I won 3 times in a row owned.  Also we went to 2 mcdonalds looking for mcflurrys because they are a crapton better here than in america.  Both places were out of them and apparently I got super pissed off about it in a comical way.  DONT REMEMBER IT

Transitional periods are a double edged sword

So Temple University is the first and only american school allowed to give out full time student visas.  This being said, every year there is an increase of about 20 percent in new student registration.  Now, this makes me happy.  I want this school to be the first of many american universities to come to japan.  The problem is that this school is starting to be stressed by the amount of students its getting.  I had to spend a few hours registering for classes because all of the ones i wanted were filled.  The problem is that there really isn’t that many classes to choose from.  This makes things tough to find classes outside your major that you dont want to kill yourself while taking.  I was forced to take some class about islam society or something.  I really don’t care about this topic but it was the only one I could find outside of taking math and english.  What makes it even worse is that the class only meets once a week and is 3 hours long.  WEAK!